The Seussification Of Romeo And Juliet — Script //free\\

Drink this! You’ll look as dead as a doornail’s third cousin. Your family will weep. They’ll cry by the dozen. Then Romeo will find you, and you’ll wake with a sneeze, And run off to live with the Grickle-Bark trees! (She drinks. She flops. She looks very dead.)

I’m sadder than socks with a singular hole. I’m glummer than glub-glub who swallowed a coal. For Rosaline-Winifred-Who doesn’t care! She looked at my heart and said, “Nope! Not in there!” MERCUTIO-GOOSE (popping up, doing a flip): Oh, piffle! Oh, poppycock! Snickle-snack-snooze! You’re rhyming with gloom in your oversized shoes! Let’s sneak to the party! Let’s bounce on a chair! Let’s dance till our toenails grow curly green hair! (SCENE TWO: The Party, which looks like a blender threw up confetti.) the seussification of romeo and juliet script

THE SEUSSIFICATION OF ROMEO AND JULIET

What is this nonsense? This rhyme-ridden mess? This Dr.-Seuss-ified tragic distress? Two kids from two families, dead on the floor Because of a squabble about who slammed a door? CAPULET (crying): I’m sorry, Montague! You’re not such a creep! MONTAGUE (crying more): You too, Capulet! Let’s hug and not weep! PRINCE TRUFFULA (shaking his head): A pox on both houses! A sneetch on each snoot! Next time, just use your words. Or a hula-hoop. For this is the lesson, as tall as a tree: Don’t fall in love at a loud, crazy party. (CURTAIN. A small mouse in a wig bows. Applause.) Drink this

She’s dead! My Gazelle-ette! My Zazz-Frazzle-Zoo! Well, I’ll just drink poison and be dead with you too! (He drinks a bottle labeled “POISON – Tastes Like Glue.” He falls over.) They’ll cry by the dozen